Writing. What a funny business. As I have often told my wife, writing anything can be a chancy endeavor. Of all the books I have written, I recall exactly one where the writing seemed to go smoothly, and even that one did not start out easily. I usually start out okay, get bogged down in the middle–sometimes several times–and though I try to finish strongly, I often wonder if I have written complete trash.

I do not recall ever making some pithy remark about writing that will be handed down as proverb to future generations, but others of far more fame than I possess certainly have. As a tribute to writing and all its glory, I would like to present to you a collection of writing quotes from famous authors, most of which are humorous, but all have something profound to say about the craft!

From now on, ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I will not put.
Winston Churchill

Ah yes, the dreaded sentence ending with a preposition. The trick I have often found is to decide whether to alter a sentence that ends in a preposition or leave it, as the alternative just sounds stupid!

Your manuscript is both good and original; but the part that is good is not original, and the part that is original is not good.
Dr. Samuel Johnson

I have posted about Samuel Johnson before. His quotes are always worth a laugh, though I will note that sometimes I feel this statement is all too apropos.

When someone is mean to me, I just make them a victim in my next book.
Mary Higgins Clark

I love it! What better revenge is there than to kill someone off in a literary sense?

The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.
Marty Feldman

Though I have never tried to write with a sword, I can imagine it!

 

If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second-greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of ‘The Elements of Style.’ The first-greatest, of course, is to shoot them now while they’re happy.
Dorothy Parker

This sounds more than a little harsh! But she may have a point . . .

Writing in English is the most ingenious torture ever devised for sins committed in previous lives.
James Joyce

Fact check true!

Easy reading is damn hard writing.
Nathaniel Hawthorne

I would argue that all writing is hard, but I cannot disagree with him in a general sense.

I would advise anyone who aspires to a writing career that before developing his talent he would be wise to develop a thick hide.
Harper Lee

An absolute necessity. Sometimes people make nasty comments for the most puerile reasons, but it takes true courage and humility to accept a well-written critique, even if it makes you want to cry.

It is perfectly okay to write garbage – as long as you edit brilliantly.
C.J. Cherryh

Trust me, I live by this maxim! Sometimes I find it’s all I can do to just get it down. “I can fix it in editing!”

The beautiful part of writing is that you don’t have to get it right the first time… unlike, say, a brain surgeon.
Robert Cormier

It certainly does lower the pressure!

The road to hell is paved with adverbs.
Stephen King

Though amusing and often quoted, this is one with which I disagree. (See what I did there?) Too many adverbs is lazy writing and can be quite distracting, but adverbs are words. Cutting them out altogether can often make a novel wordy and sometimes a replacement just doesn’t make sense.

I do not like to write – I like to have written.
Gloria Steinem

Again, a quote I can relate to. Slamming your head against a desk is not fun, but the accomplishment of completing a book is well worth the effort.

The best time for planning a book is while you’re doing the dishes.
Agatha Christie

Actually, I have my best ideas when I am either dreaming or in the shower. The problem is if I do not write them down at once, I forget them without delay!

The only thing I was fit for was to be a writer, and this notion rested solely on my suspicion that I would never be fit for real work, and that writing didn’t require any.
Russell Baker

I used to think this until I took up writing as a career. Writing can often be hard labor of the mind, even if you don’t move anything other than your fingers.

Substitute ‘damn’ every time you’re inclined to write ‘very’; your editor will delete it, and the writing will be just as it should be.
Mark Twain

What is a post of quotes without the great Mark Twain? I have been tempted a time or two to do this, but not with the word “very.”

 

This is what I find encouraging about the writing trades: They allow lunatics to seem saner than sane.
Kurt Vonnegut

No comment.

I don’t believe in being serious about anything. I think life is too serious to be taken seriously.
Ray Bradbury

Another quote I’ll have to agree with!

Sure, it’s simple, writing for kids… Just as simple as bringing them up.
Ursula K. LeGuin

As I have done both, I can attest to the truth of this statement.

Writing is the most fun you can have by yourself.
Terry Pratchett

Sometimes it’s a hoot. Other times? Not so much.

 

If you can’t annoy somebody, there is little point in writing.
Kingsley Amis

I know that I annoy many!

There you have it, folks! I hope you enjoyed this little jaunt into the sometimes strange psyche of writers. Until next time!